strepentsilences:

context: i have mentioned, several times, that i talk over a great deal of these things with someone else. that’s vee. i met them… not very long before i started to lean towards exploring vali. they are one of the absolute dearest people in my life.

this post is mostly some doubt that was lodged in my head. nothing else was coming out this week—the doubt just kept tearing down all the other drafts i had written. vali keeps validating (hah) emotions and pushing me to vent them.

this post, and how i felt when it was done… well, it’s hard to argue he’s wrong.

———

you wonder when they’re leaving.

you have these people in your life and you tell yourself don’t get too close because you know how this goes. they come in, you change, they leave. what do you have left of your roots anymore? the only people you’d call yours from when you were young wouldn’t ever claim you, and you can’t remember why they talk to you anymore.

don’t get too close. don’t let them put down roots. don’t be the ground to stand on.

don’t don’t don’t

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