Tag: support

Loss Parents Walking Alternate Paths

~ Sephira ~ Leave a comment

nathanialroyale:

thewhaleridingvulcan:

   A FB group for those who have lost children of any age and are not Christian or not conservative Christian and need a safe place to talk and discuss loss and life after a loss. 

Yay! I gave the link to a pagan friend of mine who has suffered a loss, I know little of their circumstances (he will tell me in his own time if he ever does,) but he appreciated the link ^_^ 

Loss Parents Walking Alternate Paths

A relatively small list of alternatives.

~ Sephira ~ Leave a comment

bonesandblood-sunandmoon:

bonesandblood-sunandmoon:

Please note: I’ve written this with someone specific in mind to use in their comfort box. These aren’t the only choices, and these may not work for everyone. Most are from other existing lists, but some are not.

Sources: x, support page.

–

If angry or restless:

  • Fill a paper with cross hatches
  • Draw or write what is making you angry (and rip the paper)
  • Scribble on pictures or paper (and rip up)
  • Flatten aluminum cans
  • Break sticks
  • Cut up fruit
  • — Try making a fruit salad, so there’s an incentive for the fruit to be in definite chunks.
  • Make a soft cloth doll to destroy
  • Build a pillow fort and destroy

–

If you want a physical sensation:

  • Hold an ice cube (in your hand, or where you want to self-injure)
  • Snap a rubber band against your wrist
  • Wax your legs
  • Pluck your eyebrows
  • Splash cold water in your face

–

If you want to see blood:

  • Wet a soft (not Crayola) colored pencil and draw on your skin
  • Drip red food coloring on your skin
  • Mix red food coloring with non-toxic glue *
  • Use body paint *
  • Use nail polish *
  • Make up wounds (can also apply to bruises)
  • Put a fake tattoo where you want to self-injure
  • Put henna where you want to SI

* This can also give you the sensation of picking scabs.

–

To keep your mind busy:

  • Memorize a poem
  • Write out lyrics to a favourite song
  • Pick a topic and research it
  • — Also can see how far off topic links take you
  • Sudoku puzzles
  • Math problems (stimulating, but not frustratingly hard)
  • Brainstorm potential recipes
  • — Unlimited budget and ingredients, set a budget, use a specific ingredient, etc.

–

If you need to keep your hands busy:

  • Knitting
  • Crochet
  • Embroidery
  • Make homemade bread
  • Try to make something you usually buy from scratch
  • Try a new recipe
  • Pull weeds
  • Garden
  • Clean **
  • Fold laundry **
  • Do household chores **
  • Origami
  • Organize a cluttered area **

** Unfuck Your Habitat may be a helpful resource: site, tumblr, Life Happens page, tips, Challenges (Unfuck Your Weekend, Mini, Full), etc. Note: Messiness is not a moral failing.

–

If you feel like drinking:

  • Listen to some of your favourite music (or music appropriate to mood)
  • Write out your feelings
  • Draw, paint, make art in some way.
  • Convert alcoholic drinks into non-alcoholic drinks (if applicable)
  • Color in a coloring book
  • Cuddle a stuffed animal
  • Snuggle under a warm blanket
  • Read a book (or fanfiction)
  • Watch a movie
  • Catch up on a tv series
  • Fix a favourite meal and drink

–

Online programs and other crafty things that can help to relieve stress: here, here, here, here, etc. More alternatives here and here. If a comfort box isn’t your thing, an alternatives jar might be.

~ Sephira ~ Leave a comment

yolucas:

taekookau-deactivated20160227:

heya so i thought i’d make a little help masterpost. (if you prefer a page there’s one here x)

ROUGH NIGHT? 

DEPRESSION/SELF-HARM/SUICIDE: 

ANXIETY & INSOMNIA: 

EATING DISORDERS: 

ABUSE & SEXUAL ABUSE: 

if you can think of other links to add or need help, message me anytime xx

~ Sephira ~ Leave a comment

jumpingjacktrash:

:

Sensory Overload and how to cope.

(click on images to zoom)

this is very good advice. being autistic, i’m susceptible to overload, and do my best to keep my environment restful so i’m better able to deal with the outside world when i need to, but sometimes shit happens. the number one thing i wish people knew about overload is: don’t get between me and the door. usually i catch it in time to politely excuse myself ‘for a cigarette’ but sometimes, like if i get cornered one of those people who stands too close and wears too much perfume and talks too loud and completely ignores disengagement signals, i can end up in a hurry to get away from the stimulus, and even a little panicky. so like… don’t block my path on my way out, okay?

also, don’t follow me outside and keep talking. don’t try to participate in my spindown. don’t demand reassurance every thirty seconds. don’t make it about you. i’ve got this. i don’t need your help. i just need you to stop making it worse.

Talk Therapy Online and Counseling Services.

~ Sephira ~ Leave a comment

BlahTherapy is run by and was founded (April 2010) by a single individual who has had moments just like you – where we really needed to speak to someone.

Today, BlahTherapy connects you with random strangers around the world who are willing to talk to you about your problems, as well as sharing their own. As a community, we’ve found that talking through our emotional, psychological, or mental issues is one of the best methods of releasing our anger, stress, depression or pain. Sharing and connecting with other strangers who are going through a struggles just like you provides great consolation to anyone in need of healing or a friend.

Talk Therapy Online and Counseling Services.

~ Sephira ~ Leave a comment

selfcareafterrape:

Not every survivor remembers the date it happened. However, for the ones that do, these dates can be terrifying reminders of the past. 

Personally, my traumaversary is Oct 29th. I started making plans for how to handle it 3 months in advance. Planning ahead, as far as you can, is probably a good thing to do.

Before Hand:

If you’re in college, talk to your professors. See if you can be excused from class that day, complete work due that day ahead of time, stuff like that.

If you’re able to, see if you can take off work that day, or if nothing else, just give a heads up to your boss that you may not be at your best.

Remove temptation. If you’re worried you may hurt yourself that day, go ahead and get rid of the things you could do so with. Even if it is only asking a friend to hold on to them until you’re feeling better. This is not a sign of weakness, it is not you being a burden. It is you realizing that it probably isn’t going to be a good day and you don’t want to relapse if you can help it. It is a big step, and I am super proud of you.

See if people are willing to check in with you. Whether it be a phone call, a text, a facebook chat, or coming to hang out with you- it is nice to know that people are going to be there for you on that day. 

Prepare. Make food before hand or have things that can be mircrowaved, have ‘easy’ clothing sets ready, You may surprise yourself and that day be perfectly okay- but it’s better to have things on hand just in case. 

Leave nice notes for yourself. Or have a friend help you. Especially if you think the day is going to be really rough. Having a note on the fridge, the bathroom mirror, the door… Little ‘remember, you can make it through this. I believe in you’ and various things can wonderful.

The Day of:


Be kind to yourself. It isn’t your fault if you’re upset or angry or spend all day crying. It isn’t your fault. There is nothing /wrong/ with you for reacting. You are a human being who has been through terrible trauma and anyone who judges you for how you heal is ignorant and cruel. There is also nothing wrong with you if the day goes perfectly well and you aren’t affected at all. It doesn’t mean that what happened wasn’t terrible. It just means you’re at a different place in your journey.

Know that you’re in control. You’re allowed to be alone that day if you want. You’re allowed to surround yourself with friends. You’re allowed to go out in public. You’re allowed to stay at home. Do not feel like you have to do one thing or another. Your main concern on this day should be you. Even if you make plans, you’re allowed to change them. Just because you decide a week in advance that you’re going to do plan A doesn’t mean that you aren’t allowed to throw that to the wind and do something else on that day.

Memorialize it. Now this is a personal choice, not everyone -wants- to make their trauma dates into memorials and that is a-okay. But for a lot of us, it is about taking back that day and turning it into something new. Get a tattoo. Plant a tree.  Go sky diving. Go to a theme park and ride roller coasters all day. Anything that you could look back on that date and go ‘I did it.’ 

Self Care. Take a day for self care. Watch terrible romantic comedies/sci-fi flicks/horror movies all day. Take a bubble bath. Spend time with friends who love you. Drink your favorite tea/coffee. Go to the humane shelter and pet dogs/cats. Whatever it is that you think would make you feel better? Do it.

Make something. Follow your own emotions with it. Paint. Draw. Sculpt. Even if you’ll later destroy it. Even if you finish it- you immediately rip it apart or set it on fire. At least you got it out of your system.

Give back. I know plenty of survivors who choose to spend their anniversaries volunteering in one way or another. Go through your closet and donate old clothes to a shelter that helps survivors. Make a care package with a letter to donate to a women’s shelter- pass on encouragement and advice. 

Whatever you choose to do, in whatever combination- be easy on yourself. Take a moment every now and then to check in with yourself, and ask if you’re okay. 

No matter what, I want you all to remember that I believe in you. You made it through the trauma, and you can make it through this. And I’m not saying that to silence your pain.

Your pain is valid. Your hurt is valid. You are valid.

Take care of yourself, okay?