Tag: self-care

~ Sephira ~ Leave a comment

Right this minute, there is someone going through chemotherapy shopping at your grocery store, buying popsicles and ice cream to help their sore mouth, and worrying what the cashier is going to think.

There is someone on hemodialysis buying white bread instead of whole wheat, trying to keep their phosphorus levels reasonable between appointments and hoping for the best.

There is a person attending intensive outpatient treatment for their eating disorder who has been challenged by their therapist to buy a Frappuccino.

There are dietitians picking up a dozen different candy bars to eat with their clients, who feel ashamed and guilty about enjoying them.

There is someone who just doesn’t have it in them to cook right now, and this frozen pizza and canned soup will keep them going.

There are people recovering from chronic dieting and semi-starvation who are buying chocolate and chips at their deprived body’s insistence.

All around us are people listening to what their bodies need and attempting to make the best possible choice within a context of overwhelming food pressure. All of their choices are valid, and every single one of these foods is “real.”

Michelle @ http://www.fatnutritionist.com (via onherplate)

A relatively small list of alternatives.

~ Sephira ~ Leave a comment

bonesandblood-sunandmoon:

bonesandblood-sunandmoon:

Please note: I’ve written this with someone specific in mind to use in their comfort box. These aren’t the only choices, and these may not work for everyone. Most are from other existing lists, but some are not.

Sources: x, support page.

–

If angry or restless:

  • Fill a paper with cross hatches
  • Draw or write what is making you angry (and rip the paper)
  • Scribble on pictures or paper (and rip up)
  • Flatten aluminum cans
  • Break sticks
  • Cut up fruit
  • — Try making a fruit salad, so there’s an incentive for the fruit to be in definite chunks.
  • Make a soft cloth doll to destroy
  • Build a pillow fort and destroy

–

If you want a physical sensation:

  • Hold an ice cube (in your hand, or where you want to self-injure)
  • Snap a rubber band against your wrist
  • Wax your legs
  • Pluck your eyebrows
  • Splash cold water in your face

–

If you want to see blood:

  • Wet a soft (not Crayola) colored pencil and draw on your skin
  • Drip red food coloring on your skin
  • Mix red food coloring with non-toxic glue *
  • Use body paint *
  • Use nail polish *
  • Make up wounds (can also apply to bruises)
  • Put a fake tattoo where you want to self-injure
  • Put henna where you want to SI

* This can also give you the sensation of picking scabs.

–

To keep your mind busy:

  • Memorize a poem
  • Write out lyrics to a favourite song
  • Pick a topic and research it
  • — Also can see how far off topic links take you
  • Sudoku puzzles
  • Math problems (stimulating, but not frustratingly hard)
  • Brainstorm potential recipes
  • — Unlimited budget and ingredients, set a budget, use a specific ingredient, etc.

–

If you need to keep your hands busy:

  • Knitting
  • Crochet
  • Embroidery
  • Make homemade bread
  • Try to make something you usually buy from scratch
  • Try a new recipe
  • Pull weeds
  • Garden
  • Clean **
  • Fold laundry **
  • Do household chores **
  • Origami
  • Organize a cluttered area **

** Unfuck Your Habitat may be a helpful resource: site, tumblr, Life Happens page, tips, Challenges (Unfuck Your Weekend, Mini, Full), etc. Note: Messiness is not a moral failing.

–

If you feel like drinking:

  • Listen to some of your favourite music (or music appropriate to mood)
  • Write out your feelings
  • Draw, paint, make art in some way.
  • Convert alcoholic drinks into non-alcoholic drinks (if applicable)
  • Color in a coloring book
  • Cuddle a stuffed animal
  • Snuggle under a warm blanket
  • Read a book (or fanfiction)
  • Watch a movie
  • Catch up on a tv series
  • Fix a favourite meal and drink

–

Online programs and other crafty things that can help to relieve stress: here, here, here, here, etc. More alternatives here and here. If a comfort box isn’t your thing, an alternatives jar might be.

~ Sephira ~ Leave a comment

selfcareafterrape:

Not every survivor remembers the date it happened. However, for the ones that do, these dates can be terrifying reminders of the past. 

Personally, my traumaversary is Oct 29th. I started making plans for how to handle it 3 months in advance. Planning ahead, as far as you can, is probably a good thing to do.

Before Hand:

If you’re in college, talk to your professors. See if you can be excused from class that day, complete work due that day ahead of time, stuff like that.

If you’re able to, see if you can take off work that day, or if nothing else, just give a heads up to your boss that you may not be at your best.

Remove temptation. If you’re worried you may hurt yourself that day, go ahead and get rid of the things you could do so with. Even if it is only asking a friend to hold on to them until you’re feeling better. This is not a sign of weakness, it is not you being a burden. It is you realizing that it probably isn’t going to be a good day and you don’t want to relapse if you can help it. It is a big step, and I am super proud of you.

See if people are willing to check in with you. Whether it be a phone call, a text, a facebook chat, or coming to hang out with you- it is nice to know that people are going to be there for you on that day. 

Prepare. Make food before hand or have things that can be mircrowaved, have ‘easy’ clothing sets ready, You may surprise yourself and that day be perfectly okay- but it’s better to have things on hand just in case. 

Leave nice notes for yourself. Or have a friend help you. Especially if you think the day is going to be really rough. Having a note on the fridge, the bathroom mirror, the door… Little ‘remember, you can make it through this. I believe in you’ and various things can wonderful.

The Day of:


Be kind to yourself. It isn’t your fault if you’re upset or angry or spend all day crying. It isn’t your fault. There is nothing /wrong/ with you for reacting. You are a human being who has been through terrible trauma and anyone who judges you for how you heal is ignorant and cruel. There is also nothing wrong with you if the day goes perfectly well and you aren’t affected at all. It doesn’t mean that what happened wasn’t terrible. It just means you’re at a different place in your journey.

Know that you’re in control. You’re allowed to be alone that day if you want. You’re allowed to surround yourself with friends. You’re allowed to go out in public. You’re allowed to stay at home. Do not feel like you have to do one thing or another. Your main concern on this day should be you. Even if you make plans, you’re allowed to change them. Just because you decide a week in advance that you’re going to do plan A doesn’t mean that you aren’t allowed to throw that to the wind and do something else on that day.

Memorialize it. Now this is a personal choice, not everyone -wants- to make their trauma dates into memorials and that is a-okay. But for a lot of us, it is about taking back that day and turning it into something new. Get a tattoo. Plant a tree.  Go sky diving. Go to a theme park and ride roller coasters all day. Anything that you could look back on that date and go ‘I did it.’ 

Self Care. Take a day for self care. Watch terrible romantic comedies/sci-fi flicks/horror movies all day. Take a bubble bath. Spend time with friends who love you. Drink your favorite tea/coffee. Go to the humane shelter and pet dogs/cats. Whatever it is that you think would make you feel better? Do it.

Make something. Follow your own emotions with it. Paint. Draw. Sculpt. Even if you’ll later destroy it. Even if you finish it- you immediately rip it apart or set it on fire. At least you got it out of your system.

Give back. I know plenty of survivors who choose to spend their anniversaries volunteering in one way or another. Go through your closet and donate old clothes to a shelter that helps survivors. Make a care package with a letter to donate to a women’s shelter- pass on encouragement and advice. 

Whatever you choose to do, in whatever combination- be easy on yourself. Take a moment every now and then to check in with yourself, and ask if you’re okay. 

No matter what, I want you all to remember that I believe in you. You made it through the trauma, and you can make it through this. And I’m not saying that to silence your pain.

Your pain is valid. Your hurt is valid. You are valid.

Take care of yourself, okay?

~ Sephira ~ Leave a comment

expeditionhappiness:

Just a reminder that while positivity is a great tool it is not healthy to:

  • repress negative thoughts/feelings 
  • feel guilty for having negative thoughts/feelings
  • feel that you can’t express negative thoughts/feelings 

Negative emotions are a part of life, and a truly balanced cognitive strategy will accept this (while working to change the balance of good to bad and teaching you coping strategies/self care/distraction etc)

~ Sephira ~ Leave a comment

lucysweatslove:

Making an “Alternatives” Jar

For anybody with issues with binge eating, purging, and/or self-harm (or any other type of urge), an “alternatives” jar is a good project! It is a jar filled with popsicle sticks that have things written on them that you can do when your urge hits, as an alternative to the urge.

You need:

  1. A glass jar (I used a small 8 oz old jar that I had left from a jar of jam- you can get these for $1 in some places with the jam)
  2. Popsicle sticks (I used 70 regular-sized ones from a pack of 1,000 craft sticks that I bought for $5)
  3. Markers (I used Bic Mark-It Permanent Markers, but any other marker should work, even dollar-store markers)
  4. Paints, as many colors as you want (I used Apple Barrel brand acrylic paints, which run for $0.50-$0.57 per 2 oz container at Wal Mart). 
  5. Paint brushes to use for the paints (I used Plaid brand sponge brushes, which I got for $1 for 4, and a pack of 24 different brushes which were $5 each)
  6. Ribbons and washi (decorative/paper) tape ($0.50-$3.50 per roll, however you want)

Items 4-6 are optional! You can use as much or as little paint as you want. You should only need one bottle if you are doing one color; however, you may want more!

Instructions:

  1. Gather your materials 🙂 (not too hard!)
  2. Decide how many sticks your jar will hold. Mine held 70 craft sticks; some can hold more!
  3. Decide how many colors you want to use, and if you want the colors to mean anything.
  4. Paint the craft sticks!! Do this on a surface easily cleaned, thrown away, or that you don’t mind getting messy! I used a lid from a plastic tote. You can either put the paints on a palette (if you have one), or dab it onto the sponge brushes and then paint.
  5. Let your painted sticks dry.
  6. While you are letting them dry, you can decorate your jar. Some permanent markers work on glass; others don’t. You can try them though! Acrylic paints don’t always work on glass, also. I used washi tape and ribbons, using a hot glue gun to attach the ribbons to the jar. The tape and ribbons can be removed from the jar if I so choose (so that way I can re-use the jar or re-decorate if I want to)
  7. Once the sticks dry, write on them!!

Ideas for how to use color:

You can see that I used 7 colors, each with 10 sticks. Colors can be used to denote:

  1. Type of urge (especially useful if you have multiple types)
  2. Type of emotion behind the urge or activity (feeling sad, guilty, angry, lonely, wanting sensation, etc)
  3. Amount of time the activity takes (5 min, 10 min, 15 min, 30 min, 1 hr, over 1 hr)
  4. Amount of money you’d have to invest (ie, totally free things, things you can spend $1 on, things you’d have to spend $5 on, etc)

How to use:

  1. When your urge hits, pick a color or colors to represent what you need. For example: red for me are things to get anger out, so if I’m wanting to purge because I am angry, I will choose the red sticks.
  2. Pick one stick of that color. Do that activity, and put the stick to the side. If, after you’re done with the activity, the urge is still there, pick another stick.
  3. Keep choosing sticks until the urge is gone (or you have other things you have to do)
  4. If the urge hasn’t gone away, but you are done with your sticks: choose another color and keep going.

Ideas for what to write on your sticks

  1. 101 things to do besides binge
  2. More binge alternatives
  3. Alternatives to binge eating/purging
  4. Alternatives to self-harm
  5. More alternatives to self-harm

Idea based off of: Coping Bank and Binge Jar

~ Sephira ~ Leave a comment

sherwat:

All credit goes to the masterpost…posters. Because they’re great people. 

Cheer up and Relax
Fun Stuff
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~ Sephira ~ Leave a comment

exist-ed:

erinkyan:

prettysickart:

emmisnotshortforemma:

Every day… 

I have to share the awesome app I use to negate this issue!

it’s called Medisafe and it’s a free app available in the app store or on google play and it allows you to input all your medications and:

-choose the shape, color, and dosage of each medication (including indicating if it’s an injection or a pill or an inhaler)
-notate the dosage and/or # of pills
-each time of day/night it needs to be taken
-add food or other special instructions
-schedule refill reminders
-add a med-friend (someone who will be notified if you forget to take it!)

The interface is great and i’ve found it very easy to use.  You can also add meds to take “as needed” so you can indicate that you’ve taken an out-of-time painkiller or booster pill etc.

When it’s time to take your pills it uses the text-notifcation noise on your phone to alert you- so it’s lowkey, but (usually) unmissable.  When it’s time, you have the option to snooze, dismiss, or take pills.  OR you can just shake your phone to indicate that you’ve taken them (I usually either snooze or shake the phone).

It tracks your progress too and you can export yourself an excel spreadsheet of your pill taking to give your physician etc if needed.

You can set the snooze time manually, the maximum number of alarms, all kinds of things- you can set your own alert sound too if you don’t want it to use your text-notification.

.

I am TERRRRRRRIBLE about remembering pills (seriously, I forgot for 3 weeks).  I haven’t missed a dose since I started using it and it’s fantastic.

S I G N A L B O O S T

I know a lot of folk have trouble with this so this could be super helpful!

I’m awful with remembering whether or not I’ve taken my meds #forgetful totally gonna get this

~ Sephira ~ Leave a comment

houseborgia:

LET IT GO; ”You, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection”   [LISTEN]

human – christina perri / i’m only human and I crash and I break down
let it go – disney /let it go, let it go and i’ll rise like the break of dawn
brave – sara bareilles / maybe one of these days you can let the light in, i want to see you be brave
be still – the killers / when they knock you down don’t break character, you’ve got so much heart
roar – katy perry / i went from zero, to my own hero.
breakaway – kelly clarkson / i’ll spread my wings and i’ll learn how to fly i’ll do what it takes til’ i touch the sky
who says – selena gomez/ who says, who says you’re not perfect?
beautiful -christina aguilera / you are beautiful no matter what they say. Words can’t bring you down.
born this way – lady gaga / don’t hide yourself in regret, just love yourself and you’re set
perfect – pink / please don’t you ever, ever feel like you’re less than fucking perfect
i am not a robot – marina and the diamonds/ you are not a robot, you’re lovable, so lovable but you’re just troubled
shake it out – florence and the machine / and it’s hard to dance with a devil on your back so shake him off, its always darkest before the dawn