My son and I both had rough days yesterday, and right before bedtime,
my wife and I were talking to him about good days and bad days, limits,
and why at a certain point we all start to feel overwhelmed and fall
apart. I considered bringing up spoon theory, but thought it would be a bit too abstract for him. So instead, I started talking about about Captain America’s shield.
Because
in general, every day has good stuff and bad stuff. And just like Cap,
we all have a shield we can use to deflect some of the bad stuff and
keep it from getting to us. But sometimes there’s too much stuff to
block it all, and Cap gets hurt. We all have bad days like that
sometimes, where there’s just too much.
What makes life trickier
is that your shield can change size. If you’re hungry or overtired, your
shield might shrink down to the size of a saucer, which makes it harder
to deflect anything. On the other hand, if you’ve had a good night’s
sleep, gotten some good exercise, and had fun with your friends, you
could end up with a super-shield that’s as big as you are. (Or even a
full suit of Iron Man armor. We went off on a tangent at this point,
wondering why Tony doesn’t go to Wakanda and make an Iron Man suit out
of vibranium.)
As a metaphor, Cap’s shield worked well. We talked
about why something might not bother you one day, but the same thing
might really get to you on another, depending on how big your shield is
that day, and how much else you’ve been trying to deflect. It also
seemed to be a good way of talking about self-care, and ways to
strengthen your shield so it wouldn’t shrink or crack.
Don’t know if it will be helpful to anyone else, but it was a good conversation with my son, so I figured I’d put it out there.
Holding the Bowl 